Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Anne Nicole Smith Baby Daddy Pool

Odds on Dannielynn Hope Marshall Stern's father are:

Larry Birkhead - ex-boyfriend, entertainment photojournalist: 3-1

Howard K. Stern - purported father, Smith's longtime personal attorney and non-binding commitment ceremony partner: 4-1

Frédéric Prinz von Anhalt - fake prince, Zsa Zsa Gabor husband, secret Smith lover and almost adobtive father: 7-1

J. Howard Marshall - dead second husband, oil tycoon, rumored frozen sperm donor: 10-1

Gaither Ben Thompson - another former boyfriend, real estate developer, rightful property owner: 15-1

Hugh Hefner - Playboy kingpin, dirty old man: 50-1

Daniel Wayne Smith - dead hillbilly son from first marriage: 75-1

Shane Gibson - Bahamian Immigration Minister, photo subject: 75-1

Alex Goen - TrimSpa honcho, chopper enthusiast, fellow defendant: 75-1

Billy Smith - first husband, previous Smith impregnator: 100-1

Chynna Doll - freaky hermaphrodite chum and film co-star: 100-1

Some kinda crazy mass sperm mix: even

My New Birthdate

For now I truly live.

I got my Halo 3 e-mail. It said, congratulations , you were one of the first 13,333 gamers to meet the "Rule of Three" program eligibility requirements. As a result, you have been selected to participate in the Halo® 3 beta.

Two words. Man Canon.


Hells. Yeah.

Friday, February 09, 2007

There Are Times Even I Am At A Loss...

Out of all of the headlines in the wake of Anna Nicole Smith's passing, this was the one I was least expecting to see. I mean... Dear lord.

via AP wire

Gabor Husband May Be Smith's Baby's Dad

LOS ANGELES - The husband of actress Zsa Zsa Gabor said Friday that he had a decade-long affair with Anna Nicole Smith and may be her infant daughter's father.

The claim by Prince Frederick von Anhalt comes amid a paternity suit over Smith's 5-month-old daughter, Dannielynn. The birth certificate lists Dannielynn's father as attorney Howard K. Stern, but former Smith boyfriend Larry Birkhead is waging a legal challenge, saying he is the father.

"If you go back from September, she wasn't with one of those guys, she was with me," von Anhalt told The Associated Press in an interview Friday.

He said he would file a lawsuit if Dannielynn is turned over to Stern or Birkhead.

Von Anhalt, 59, and Gabor, 90, have been married for more than 20 years.

Gabor, a onetime sex symbol and star of such 1950s films as "Moulin Rouge" and "Queen of Outer Space," has been in declining health in recent years and suffered a stroke in 2005. She was partially paralyzed in a car crash in 2002.

Von Anhalt, who is Gabor's eighth husband, said he and Smith first met in the 1990s when Smith was still married to elderly oil tycoon J. Howard Marshall II. He said Smith approached him and Gabor at the Plaza Hotel in New York.

"She was a very big fan of Zsa Zsa and wanted to be like Zsa Zsa," he said. "She wanted to be a princess."

He said the two started an affair soon after, meeting over the years in Los Angeles, San Francisco and New York. For much of that time, he said, Smith urged him to make her a princess like his wife.

But short of divorcing the actress, he said the only solution would have been adopting Smith. Von Anhalt said he did consider that and even filled out adoption papers, but Gabor refused to sign them.

Meanwhile, a judge on Friday refused to order an emergency DNA test on the body of Anna Nicole Smith as part of a paternity suit involving her infant daughter, but he ordered that the body be preserved until a hearing in 10 days, attorneys said.

A medical examiner began an autopsy Friday on Anna Nicole Smith, whose mother blamed drugs for the former Playboy playmate's sudden death that ended an extraordinary tabloid life at just 39.

"I think she had too many drugs, just like Danny (Smith's late son)," her mother, Vergie Arthur, told ABC's "Good Morning America" on Friday. "I tried to warn her about drugs and the people that she hung around with. She didn't listen."

"She was too drugged up," Arthur said. "By the last interview I saw of her, she was so wasted."

Smith's attorney, Ron Rale, said the one-time reality TV star had been ill for several days with a fever and was still depressed over the death five months ago of her 20-year-old son from what a private medical examiner determined was a combination of methadone and two antidepressants.

On Thursday, authorities say, a private nurse found Smith unconscious in her room at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino and called 911. A bodyguard performed CPR, Seminole Police Chief Charlie Tiger said, but Smith was declared dead at a hospital.

Late Thursday, sheriff's deputies carried out at least eight brown paper bags sealed with red evidence tape from Smith's hotel room.

Several detectives are reviewing the hotel surveillance tapes to see if they might provide a clue to what happened, Deputy Police Chief Michael Browne said Friday. He said they had interviewed everyone connected to the death and no one was under suspicion.

"Nothing about this death seems suspicious. We're not treating it that way," Browne said. "We're being very thorough. We're going to look at everything."

Edwina Johnson, chief investigator for the Broward County Medical Examiner's Office, said an autopsy was under way Friday morning to try to determine the cause of death.

If Smith died of natural causes, the findings will likely be announced quickly, but definitive results could take weeks, said Dr. Joshua Perper, who was performing the autopsy.

"I am not a prophet, and I cannot tell you before the autopsy what I am going to find," he said.

Smith's son's death in the Bahamas on Sept. 10 came just a few days after she gave birth to a daughter, Dannielynn, whose custody remains in dispute.

The birth certificate lists Dannielynn's father as attorney Howard K. Stern, Smith's most recent companion, who Rale said was with Smith at the hotel and was too choked up to talk when he called Rale with the news. Smith's ex-boyfriend Larry Birkhead is waging a legal challenge, saying he is the father.

At a hearing Friday in Los Angeles, a judge declined Birkhead's attorney's request to order an immediate DNA sample be taken from Smith's body. The judge ordered the body be retained, though, until a hearing on Feb. 20, attorney Debra Opri said.

Opri said the DNA is needed to connect Smith with Dannielynn "so that no one can switch the babies."

She also asked the judge to take jurisdiction over the child until her paternity is established. "Nothing was granted. Nothing was denied," she said.

Rale, Smith's attorney, said it was "despicable that we would have an emergency notice and appear right now."

The baby was being cared for in the Bahamas by the mother of Shane Gibson, the Bahamian immigration minister who is a close friend of Smith's, People magazine reported on its Web site, citing unidentified sources.

A visibly shaken Gibson declined comment as he was leaving his office Thursday night, and he has not responded to several message left by The Associated Press seeking comment.

Through the '90s and into the 21st century, Smith was famous for being famous, a pop-culture punchline because of her up-and-down weight, her Marilyn Monroe looks, her exaggerated curves, her little-girl voice, her ditzy-blonde persona and her over-the-top revealing outfits.

Recently, she lost a reported 69 pounds and became a spokeswoman for TrimSpa, a weight-loss supplement. In recent TV appearances, her speech was often slurred and she seemed out of it. Some critics said she seemed drugged-out.

"Undoubtedly it will be found at the end of the day that drugs featured in her death as they did in the death of poor Daniel," said Michael Scott, a former attorney for Smith in the Bahamas.

Rale said he had talked to her on Tuesday or Wednesday, and she had flu symptoms and a fever and was still grieving over her son. He dismissed claims her death was related to drugs as "a bunch of nonsense."

"Poor Anna Nicole," he said. "She's been the underdog. She's been besieged ... and she's been trying her best and nobody should have to endure what she's endured."

The Texas-born Smith was a topless dancer at a strip club before she made the cover of Playboy magazine in 1992. She became Playboy's playmate of the year in 1993. She was also signed to a contract with Guess jeans, appearing in TV commercials, billboards and magazine ads.

In 1994, she married 89-year-old oil tycoon J. Howard Marshall II, owner of Great Northern Oil Co. After his death the following year, she engaged in a protracted legal fight with her former stepson, E. Pierce Marshall, over whether she had a right to the estate.

A federal court in California awarded Smith $474 million. That was later overturned. But in May, the U.S. Supreme Court revived her case, ruling that she deserved another day in court.

The stepson died June 20 at age 67, but the family said the court fight would continue.

Smith starred in her own reality TV series, "The Anna Nicole Show," in 2002-04. She also appeared in movies, performing a bit part in "The Hudsucker Proxy" in 1994.

Smith was born Vickie Lynn Hogan on Nov. 28, 1967, in Houston, one of six children. Her parents split up when she was a toddler, and she was raised by her mother, a deputy sheriff.

She dropped out after 11th grade after she was expelled for fighting, and worked as a waitress and then a cook at Jim's Krispy Fried Chicken restaurant in Mexia, Texas.

She married 16-year-old fry cook Bill Smith in 1985, giving birth to Daniel before divorcing two years later.

Friday, February 02, 2007

I Have A Few Theories About This "Ultimate Goal" And Most Involve Ingesting Urine

via Associated Press

Fake Employer Took Women's Urine Samples

OMAHA, Neb. - A 36-year-old Omaha man accused of luring women to his home and taking urine samples when they thought they were applying for a job was found guilty Thursday of two counts of criminal impersonation.

Victims told police Kevin Oliver said he worked for cell phone company T-Mobile and was interviewing them for jobs. Prosecutors said there never were any jobs.

"To this day, we don't know what his ultimate goal was but whatever it was it was deceptive, it was damaging and it was protracted," said Omaha city prosecutor Marty Conboy. "This went on for 18 months that we know of."

After three searches of Oliver's home, authorities came up with no other signs of criminal activity. With credit for time already served, Oliver will spend eight days in jail and 18 months on probation.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

More Proof Why Boston Is Straight Up Chump

Redsox fans... Boston Rob... And look at this shit. Are you fucking kidding me? Why not be outraged by your shitty traffic patterns and despicable racism instead of some painfully obvious viral marketing signs. Yes, if you see something like that, check it out first, make sure it's not dangerous. These are scary times and you have to be careful about anything that looks suspicious. But once the concern has been alleviated, chill the fuck out.To be this blown away and up in arms? Seriously Boston, you suck my balls.

via AP

Boston Officials Livid Over Ad Stunt

BOSTON - Boston officials, livid about a publicity campaign that had disrupted the city by stirring fears of terrorism, vowed to prosecute those responsible and seek restitution.

Officials found a slew of blinking electronic signs adorning bridges and other high-profile spots across the city Wednesday, prompting the closing of a highway and the deployment of bomb squads.

The 38 signs were part of a promotion for Cartoon Network TV show "Aqua Teen Hunger Force," a surreal series about a talking milkshake, a box of fries and a meatball. The network is a parent of Turner Broadcasting Systems, Inc.

"It is outrageous, in a post 9/11 world, that a company would use this type of marketing scheme," Mayor Thomas Menino said. "I am prepared to take any and all legal action against Turner Broadcasting and its affiliates for any and all expenses incurred during the response to today's incidents."

The 1-foot tall signs resembled a circuit board, with protruding wires and batteries. Most depicted a boxy, cartoon character giving passersby the finger _ a more obvious sight when darkness fell.

Turner Broadcasting, a division of Time Warner Inc., apologized, but Boston authorities are still angry.

They arrested two men who put up the electronic promotions and vowed to hold Turner accountable for what Menino said was "corporate greed," that led to at least $500,000 in police costs.

Turner said the devices have been in place for two to three weeks in 10 cities: Boston; New York; Los Angeles; Chicago; Atlanta; Seattle; Portland, Ore.; Austin, Texas; San Francisco; and Philadelphia. As soon as the company realized the Boston problem, it said, law enforcement officials were told of their locations in all 10 cities.

"We apologize to the citizens of Boston that part of a marketing campaign was mistaken for a public danger," said Phil Kent, Turner chairman.

Kent said the marketing company that placed the signs, Interference Inc., was ordered to remove them immediately. Messages seeking additional comment from the Atlanta-based Cartoon Network were left with several publicists.

Highways, bridges and a section of the Charles River were shut down Wednesday and bomb squads were sent in. Turner notified them that the devices were part of a promotion at around 5 p.m., Boston officials said.

"Everyone can play a part by holding Turner Broadcasting to account for today's events," Suffolk District Attorney Daniel Conley said. "Viewers, advertisers, license holders, can and should make clear to them this sort of behavior is reckless, irresponsible and illegal."

"Commerce was disrupted, transportation routes were paralyzed, residents were stranded and relatives across the nation were in fear for their loved ones in the city of Boston," Conley said.

Peter Berdovsky, 27, of Arlington, and Sean Stevens, 28, of Charlestown, were each charged Wednesday night with one count of placing a hoax device and one count of disorderly conduct. State Attorney General Martha Coakley said they were hired to place the devices. Both men were to be arraigned Thursday morning.

Those conducting the campaign should have known the devices could cause panic because they were placed in sensitive areas, Coakley said. Authorities are investigating whether Turner and any other companies should be criminally charged, she said.

"We're not going to let this go without looking at the further roots of how this happened to cause the panic in this city," Coakley said.

In Seattle and several suburbs, the removal of the signs was low-key. "We haven't had any calls to 911 regarding this," Seattle police spokesman Sean Whitcomb said Wednesday. Police in Philadelphia said they believe their city had 56 devices.

In New York City, local news broadcasts showed images of the devices being collected, and the New York Post reported that police confiscated 41 in Manhattan and Brooklyn.

Interference had no immediate comment. A woman who answered the phone at the New York-based firm's offices Wednesday afternoon said the firm's CEO was out of town and would not be able to comment until Thursday.

Berdovsky, an artist, told The Boston Globe he was hired by Interference and said he was "a little kind of freaked out," by the furor.

"I find it kind of ridiculous that they're making these statements on TV that we must not be safe from terrorism, because they were up there for three weeks and no one noticed. It's pretty commonsensical to look at them and say this is a piece of art and installation," he told The Globe.

Berdovsky's attorney described the incident as a "misunderstanding."

"It's very disturbing that what was just an employment for a struggling artist turned into some major misunderstanding," Michael Rich told WHDH-TV.

A telephone voicemail box for Berdovsky was full Wednesday night. It could not immediately be determined if Stevens had legal counsel.

The first device to raise alarm in Boston was found by a transit worker at a subway and bus station underneath Interstate 93 on Wednesday morning, leading to the temporary shutdown of the station and the highway.

Later, police said four calls, all around 1 p.m., reported devices at the Boston University Bridge and the Longfellow Bridge, at a Boston street corner and at the Tufts-New England Medical Center.

Two devices, at the Longfellow Bridge and the medical center, however, turned out to be unrelated to the marketing campaign, Police Commissioner Edward Davis said.

The rash of calls around the same time is being investigated, Davis said. When asked if the calls were coordinated as part of the marketing campaign, he said: "There's no indication it came from panicked residents."

"Aqua Teen Hunger Force" is a cartoon with a cultish following that airs as part of a block of programs for adults on the Cartoon Network. A feature length film based on the show is slated for release March 23.

*****UPDATE******

Thank you Scott Taylor for finding this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zx2ytr2Oyv4